Mental Health for Writers Part 2
Fiction writing, for me, is the thing that allows me to feel 100% myself. Maybe you can relate. When I sit down to write a story, it feels like I am—miraculously—doing what I was made to do and being who I was made to be. It’s a glorious feeling, but it is also a double-edged sword. On one hand, what a gift to have found something that makes me feel so happy and fulfilled! On the other hand, not doing that thing can feel completely miserable.
Here are a few ideas I’ve gotten from others (let’s go therapy!) as well as my own thoughts on how to stay grounded and healthy as a writer:
Recognize that No Experiences Are Wasted
Even if you are not writing full-time, your work and experiences in other areas can still help you develop as a writer. For instance, there are many jobs in which you will find yourself:
refining your communication skills
learning about how people think, behave, and interact
acquiring a niche skillset and a base of knowledge that can be worked into stories and characters
building your creativity, patience, empathy, wisdom, humour, and self-confidence
If you ever find yourself feeling bitter towards your normal-life commitments—whether they show up in the form of your day-job, your social obligations, or something else—ask yourself how those experiences are helping you hone your skills as a writer.
Because here’s the thing: we actually have to go out and live in the world in order to write truthfully about it. As much as we may want to stay at home with our fictional friends (shout-out to my fellow introverts), the real world is where we spark our inspiration and arm ourselves with authenticity.
Shift Your Priorities
There is a lot of rejection and disappointment in the publishing industry. If we’re in it for the long game, however, we writers must be continually falling in love with the process of writing, not the product.
Don’t get me wrong, the product is great! Books really are miracles: so many hours of thought, labor, and collaboration crafted into a tangible stack of paper that we get to hold in our hands. To me, they are—and will always be—one of the greatest things in the world.
But writers have to love the grueling process that leads to that long-awaited book on the shelf. A writer is not what you are, but who you are. It’s your character, your way of being. It is the patience, perseverance, and joy that come when you continue to pick up your pen or clack away on your keyboard, day after day, night after night. Despite the rejection emails. Despite the lack of interest or income. A writer writes for the sheer delight of it.
Have People in Your Corner
Writing can be a lonely business. It’s an isolating experience to pour your heart and soul out on the page only to have it sit stagnant on your personal computer or in the inboxes of people who just aren’t interested. I HIGHLY recommend finding a few people who genuinely enjoy your work. Not everyone will, and that’s okay. Search for the ones that do: family, friends, a writer’s group, readers on Substack, whatever works. You don’t need them to be professional editors—although if you have people in your life who will be genuine and give you honest feedback, that is also important. For your own mental health, you need to find some cheerleaders. Even just one person who is invested in your writing—who genuinely enjoys it—can make a world of difference.
Be Aware of Your Physical Writing Habits
Your body can help you zero in on your mental state while writing. Jot yourself a sticky note reminder to check in with your body while you work. You may be surprised when you start to tune into some of your physical habits. Are your shoulders tensed? Are you holding your breath? Do you keep touching your face or your neck?
If you notice any unexpected tension creeping in while you’re writing, address it. Take your hands off the keys for a moment. Relax your muscles. Take a full breath. If you can, try to figure out what is causing you to tense up. Are you holding yourself to unreasonably high standards in your writing? Are the words just not flowing the way you’d like? Or are you stressed about something that is completely separate from your work but still hanging over your head?
If you figure out what’s stressing you out, try to counter it with something true. Remind yourself that the world isn’t depending you to write the perfect sentence. Your worth doesn’t rely on you crafting a great page today. And if there’s something going on outside of your writing, give yourself permission to be present with your work. There are a lot of important things vying for our attention on a day-to-day basis; just remember, your writing is important too. It has value and you’re allowed to acknowledge that.